Week 2 Power Rankings

CO RECESS POWER RANKINGS - WEEK 2

1. Pink Tacos (0-0) 

The Tacos have yet to give up a run in league play. Who will be the first to penetrate the Meat Curtain? The Peep Show and BALLCRUSHERS are on deck this week.

2. STU GOTZ (2-0) 

The Gotz Mob this week will be without the Gotzfather, who had to travel to Chicago “on business.” How will the players respond without their fearless leader? KNOCKN CLEATS is no easy foe.

3. BALLCRUSHERS (1-1)

 A close loss to the only remaining undefeated team followed by a victory against CFB, which was once thought to be a championship contender? When this team gets the WAKA rules dialed, it might be time for the veteran squads to start keeping a watchful eye on their balls.

4. KNOCKN CLEATS (1-1) 

Still sluggish from binge boozing and knockin’ sandals on the WAKA cruise, these players needs to regain their focus heading into a brawl with rival STU GOTZ.

5. CFB: The O-Face (1-1) 

The O-Face has lost a game by a run and won a game by a run. It wouldn’t be CFB without a sweat-inducing struggle that leads to a titillating late-night climax.

6. Safe Word (0-2) 

“Rumplemintz?! Rutabaga?!?! RENEE ZELLWEGER??!! OH GOD I DON’T REMEMBER THE WORD PLEASE STOP JUST STOP. (A cracking whip.) (Muffled gargling.) (Silence.)” – Overheard on the WAKA Cruise

7. The Peep Show (1-1) 

The mark of a good team is how well it responds following a tough loss. After scoring only one run against STU GOTZ, the road doesn’t get any easier for The Creeps as they take on the Pink Tacos and its league-leading defense.

CO MILE HIGH POWER RANKINGS - WEEK 2

1. Your Mom (2-0)

Indisputably the team to beat. The Lady in Green is in a class of her own, and it's not even close.

2. Rocky Mountain Ice (2-0)

Ice is currently the favorite to finish as the Mile High runner-up, but this squad has a lot of work to do if it ever wants to challenge Your Mom. There are some serious holes on the defense, which has almost allowed a run twice now in as many weeks.

3. Where My Pitches At? (0-0)

The blue team burst onto the scene in a big way in Week 2, showing up undermanned, late and without much knowledge of WAKA rules. That didn't stop them from almost beating the fully powered PINK TACOS, only losing by a run (the official result was a forfeit). More importantly, the Pitches seemed to be having the most fun of any team at Infinity Park.

4. Camp Gladiator Mile High Burpee Club (0-3)

I'm putting them this high with the hope of getting a free month of personal training. Don't judge me. It's almost bikini season.

5. PINK TACOS (1-1)

Has anyone tried the new Cool Ranch Dorito Taco from Taco Bell? Please send a review to wakadenvergmot@gmail.com. I'm curious. Oh, and the Tacos won their first game this week and look to build momentum with a double-header against Camp Gladiator and Grey Balls of Fire/50 Shades of Grey/11 Shades of Grey/Make Up Your Damn Mind Already. Blah blah blah. Cool Ranch Taco thoughts, please.

6. CFB: The Mile High Club (1-1)

I just made the correlation that there are two "Mile High Club"-themed teams in the CO Mile High league. I need some time to make jokes out of this. Please return next week.

7. Yahtzee! (1-1) 

The giant version of Yahtzee! that Ice brought must have got into the players' heads. After losing by 16, Yahtzee! looks to bounce back with some better rolls. Hint: it's all in the wrist, like I learned when I turned 12.  

8. Grey Balls of Fire! (1-1)

I refuse to put this team anywhere except the cellar until its name stays the same for two consecutive weeks. C'mon, man!